Things that could be keeping my baby awake at night:
She needs a clean diaper.
She’s not tired enough.
It’s too light in the room.
It’s too dark in the room.
Her diaper is too loose.
Her diaper is too tight.
It’s too loud.
It’s too quiet.
She has an itch.
Her pacifier fell out.
The temperature changed 0.0000000001 degrees and she sensed it.
I’m breathing and it’s bothering her.
Someone turned the TV volume up seven houses down.
She had a bad dream about aliens taking over the earth.
She can’t stop thinking about what it would be like to be a cat.
Her pacifier fell out. Again.
She’s really excited about Christmas being only six months away.
She can’t remember if she remembered to lock the front door.
She forgot to take her Ambien before bed.
She did her cardio too close to bedtime.
But really, the real reason she wakes up at night is probably because she’s a baby.
This post brought to you by the annoyed mother who’s sick of hearing what she could possibly be doing differently to get her baby to sleep through the night.